In today's society were taught that it's abnormal or foreign to get along with the what's Label as "Other Baby Mama"
An Yes of course if were not taught differently we Obey that.
I know I did, I didn't like the fact that someone was playing Mommy With My Daughter,at 16 growing up everyone Had a say so in how I Parented Gracie.
Everyone told me "WHY" I shouldn't get along with Gracies dad or His girlfriend.
I fed off that Rush of what I thought was Right, because since I'm MOM I'm Always right even if I'm wrong you can't say so. After awhile I realized My Daughter Needs Both Parents she Needs To know her Dad,its only Fair.
With all the back an fourth arguing an all the He said she said Bs I was over Trying to Co-parent.
See It was about HOW I felt,an all My Anger an Confusion.
I wasn't worried how this would affect Our Daughter in the long run.
On New years of 2013 as the ball Dropped I Told Gracie an My self I promise to Really Try,I promise NOT to give up Because you deserve this,you deserve the best life. Even if I don't like some things I promise to just try an not give up.To not let anyone come between how I feel about this idea,an just remember that it's for the best.
An its time that I start to think an figure things out on My own as a Mother,an to Co-parent.
I began to understand Sabrina an Realize she has put up with alot, an she wasn't going anywhere lol.
An all that Mattered was we Respected each other an Each others Kids. I wanted her to love an care for Gracie as her own an everything else fell into place Really..
Recently Michael asked if he could see gracie while he was in town an take her for ice cream i was like ya ok..
I just said you know what Michael is her Dad,Sabrina has 3 kids they will be fine if I leave her alone for the first time lol.
So of course Gracie Screamed an cried but I was like your fine I know shell have fun.
In complete shock Michael was like umm OK lol , because I never done this before..
When I came back later to get her she was running around having fun playing with her Siblings, I felt good on how far we have come,on how we learned to parent as a Blended Family.This isn't easy, it took 4 years but it does get better.
It gets better with the child's father if you make it,its a constant fight to remember its not about how you feel towards them,its about Your child you have with them. They Matter in this, an parents should be able to co parent with out any stress.
I love what we have built we have a understanding about everything. We're Great friends an communicate Good,Sabrina is a Good Friend an we built a good relationship, it will take hard work an determination to get to where we are at today but it is Possible an its worth the Hard times..
Let's welcome the "OtherBabymama"
This is Rare an i know some of you Moms are in shock but like i said we have come along way an were PROUD that we can do this.
Sabrina:
we have both said our share of mean, ugly and completely disrespectful thing. From listening to others opinions to being told she said this and she said that. From other having an opinion on how our relationships should be and being told baby mamas and girlfriend aren't supposed to get along. I had never experienced the hate between people when another person is involved and has another child with someone else, my parents never showed the ugly in front of me or maybe I was just plain blind to it all. I didn't understand how one day Marisa and I could be fine with one another and the next we were enemies again because someone told her I said something about her and she said something bad about me. It took 3 years before there was no longer other people getting involved and we as people (Gracie's dad included) could talk without an argument between the two of them I was constantly being a buffer and Marissa didn't always like that; but when you'd hear the way a conversation was turning from a talk to and ugly argument who wouldn't want to intervene?
Now as Gracie turned 4 this year I can say with confidence everything is so much better. We can all hang out and be in the same room without it being tense or awkward. Marissa and I have a good friendship as well as Gracie's dad and her. Believe it or not the goal I was looking forward to years before. I love Gracie she is include as one of my kids. We don't get to see her like we'd like to with finances getting in the way as well as our schedules and now living an hour and a half away from each other. 4 years ago no one that seen all we went threw would tell you they could see us all talking and being civil in the same room, but it's all for Gracie and now her siblings she has an older brother and 2 sisters who love her dearly.
No one can tell you how to live your lives weather it be the father of your child(ren) being in a relationship with someone else or vis versa. All you can do is grown up and realize everything you do to be civil with that person will only benefit your child(ren), learn from us and move past the ugly & bitterness and fast forward to the positive.
Till next time Xoxo -Marissa
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